Explore..

Oh the wonder of this world. The beauty of God’s creation. Today I noticed a cardinal fly right in front of our truck.  It was a day brightener. The Preacher and I had made a trip to the hills of Arkansas to see our newest grandchild.  Oh goodness what a treat that was. Oh the wonder of this creation. 

            

Some day he will be outdoors, barefoot and joining his sister chasing the chickens around the yard. But for now he slept peacefully in my arms.  His ruddy complexion, large blue eyes and the sweetest little cleft in his chin. I took out his tiny hands from the cuddle he was in and thanked God for the hands He gave my grandson and that He would use those hands for good and honorable purposes. Next I took a peak at his baby feet. Oh the wonder of this life. His mommy tells me that she noticed he has my toes.  I smiled and inside had this indescribable feeling that somehow part of me is part of him. When he peeked out of those big lids I was transported back to 27+ years ago when I looked into the eyes of my son.  This grandson of mine is the marvelous fusion of the love of two people and the grace of an awesome and generous God. Oh the wonder of commitment.  I lean and smell his baby smell, the newness of him.  My heart is about to explode with love as I hold him close and cherish this opportunity.  Time goes by so swiftly so I take a picture in my mind to tuck away and think of often. 

Sitting a few feet away is my son.  He’s reading Little Pilgrim’s Progress to his two and half year old daughter and she is completely engrossed in the story.  She is listening. He is animated. I am humbled and blessed to witness this holy scene. Oh the wonder of witnessing your child be a parent.  All too soon the chapter is over and my granddaughter is ready to be out in the sunshine so she heads for the door, puts her poppy pink crocs on and turns to see who else is going to join her.  That sweet smile is all it takes and her PopPop hops up and is already following her out to see her new chicks in the workshop.  When I look out the window a few minutes later he is pushing her around the driveway pad in her pink “fun buggy”. Oh the wonder of being a grandparent.

                                        

💚

Before we say goodbye this newly minted family of four gathers on the porch swing and I snap some photos of their grinning faces. Baby boy snoozing away, big sister proudly holding her baby brother’s hand, honey-sweet sleep deprived smiles of daddy and mommy.  The bliss of time standing still and capturing this Friday morning in April. Oh the wonder of family. We hug and say “see you soon, love you”.  As we drive down the dusty dirt road part of my heart left behind, I noticed a cardinal fly right in front of our truck and it lifted my spirits.  A reminder from the Lord that He is with our family no matter where we are.  It was a day brightener.  Oh the wonder of a God Who sees me and continues to show me His love. 

                                            

My favorite time of year

Fall is a beautiful time of year.  In fact its been my favorite time of the year since I was a child and went to grade school at St. Ann's in Carthage, Mo.  Within a few weeks of school starting there was the arrival of a season change which brought more pleasant temperatures, beautiful multi-colored trees and loads of fun playing kickball, Chinese jump rope, freeze tag and even crack-the-whip (Here is how Wikipedia explains the game:

Crack the Whip is a simple outdoor children's game that involves physical coordination, and is usually played in small groups, either on grass or ice. One player, chosen as the "head" of the whip, runs (or skates) around in random directions, with subsequent players holding on to the hand of the previous player. The entire "tail" of the whip moves in those directions, but with much more force toward the end of the tail. The longer the tail, the more the forces act on the last player, and the tighter they have to hold on.

As the game progresses, and more players fall off, some of those who were previously located near the end of the tail and have fallen off can "move up" and be in a more secure position by grabbing onto the tail as it is moving, provided they can get back on before some of the others do. There is no objective to this game other than the enjoyment of the experience.)

Can you imagine the fun?  That was when students were allowed 3. Yes.Three. Recesses a day.  Okay that's not what this post is about so I'll save that for another time.  Fall meant sweatshirt/sweater weather and boots.  FOOTBALL!  The Maple Leaf Parade where friends and family still gather to watch 200+ bands and floats make the 1.5 mile trek to the Carthage Middle School.  I was blessed enough to live on that route for a short period of time and have front row seats to the parade twice.  The first time I had only lived at the corner of Grant and Chestnut for about 2 months, on that particular Saturday morning I had no idea what God had in store for my life.   

I remember the conversation that had recently taken place with a sweet friend of mine who was dying of cancer and how she encouraged me to keep seeking God assuring me of His love.  She was comforting me because I was brokenhearted from a divorce that was now final and overwhelmed by the difficulty of being a single parent.  It made no sense to me.  I asked God why?? Why was my friend, who had a husband that loved her and this beautiful brood of children, why was she so sick? They need her God.  This isn't fair...

Then I looked at my life,  my marriage was over and my children would be shuttled back and forth between 2 homes one weekday, every other weekend and every holiday for the rest of their childhood.  Why wasn't I the one dying of cancer.  God didn't answer my questions that day but I know He was listening.  He had sent this sweet friend and the promise found in Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the planss I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prospert you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  It gave me hope to continue on in my struggle.  

On that particular Saturday morning in October it was crisp but a beautiful, sunny day.  My sweet friend felt well enough and came to my house to watch the Maple Leaf Parade.  It was my first weekend without my children and I had not slept all night.  It was an honor and blessing to have a guaranteed place where she and her family could watch the parade.  I wish I had pictures of that day.   I remember her saying some really funny things and we were all laughing.  I wish I had hugged her longer before they left that day. 

The next morning at church my sweet friend was there but did not play the piano (which she always did) and so I assumed she was not feeling well.  The following week was a blur but I remember vividly the phone call I received late Saturday night October 28th.  My mind could not comprehend what the person was saying to me. How could this be true? I had just seen her on Sunday morning. Triumphantly she took her last breath and went home to be with the Lord.  I will never forget her or the influence she had on my life.  Her shared wisdom has continued to help me.  God used her then to answer questions I have now.  He knows the plans He has for our lives.  He has given me hope and a future.

I'm still thankful for Fall and the changing seasons.  Grateful for the beautiful trees, the cooler air, football games and parades.  All of these remind me of the past- good things and hard things and how faithful God is in bringing a life story full circle.  My story. Your story.  His Story.  Fall is a beautiful time of year.
                                                                       

This is us...

So here we are 19 years strong. Life has bustled on and like never in the past, we sat Halloween night waiting for the rush of trick or treaters and watching the World Series (Go Royals!).  Feeling blessed and happy that we got to see some of our children and two of our sweet grandchildren in costume and of course Frank (the Boxer) made an appearance and wore Uncle Trigger (our VeRy old Lab) completely out. Later I got texts and an email with pictures of the other grandchildren to make the day complete.   Having an empty nest is a lot different than I imagined, after years of doing and being responsible for so many it's easy to become lazy and complacent spending hours literally doing nothing productive. As a matter of fact i feel very unprepared many a day because i have spent so little time getting my thoughts and plans mentally organized.  Too much time can be a foe. I find myself forgetting things that are important if i don't make a point to follow up and complete a task right away.  It gets tucked in a locked file in my mind and I forget it's even there.  I battle fickleness (out of sight - out of mind) I battle losing track of things because i put them exactly where i knew I wouldn't forget they were only to completely forget, where i put them. I know what you're thinking (this lady is getting old and doesn't want to admit it).  I tried to feign early alzheimer's to The PrEacHer today but he didn't buy it.  This post is to get me thinking.  To get me moving toward a goal i have to share information, to share news, to clear my foggy mind. Im not going to expect much from it starting out because honestly i can't really put two good thoughts together right now.  My mind is already spinning thinking of all the other things i should be doing instead of this.  However, God has done great and unbelievable things in me and I am so grateful i don't want to keep His goodness to myself.  It's good to recognize the changing seasons of life and embrace them.  This is going to be the best chapter yet.  So... here we are 19 years strong.